Tuesday, August 31, 2010

baby cashew :)

Baby Cashew I have to say that I can't wait to meet you even though I am totally scared of delivery. I think mostly for myself just because of all the trouble with my heart/ whatever that whole ordeal was. I keep thinking positive though and visualizing myself after the birth and holding you :) I also can't wait to find out if your a little boy or a little girl :) I know your daddy also can't wait. I couldn't imagine waiting until March 8th!

I also worry that something will be wrong with you, like you will have a birth defect etc. I second guess everything that I eat, was it cooked enough, was it cleaned enough before eating it. I worry when I forget to take my multivitimin and worry when I forget to drink milk. I guess I worry to much. All babies on both sides of the family are healthy and that is all I ask for for you. That you are healthy. I would love for you to be a girl, but in the end as long as your healthy it really doesn't matter to me :) And really no matter what happens we will always love you - healthy or not. I try to think positive - so far the blood tests etc have come back fine - except my thryroid number is higher again but Doc assured me that it's still in the normal zone. Just something we have to watch for and also my blood pressure just because my bottom number has been high in the past. It's good that he is looking out for that. Also he found your heartbeat super quick and said it sounded strong and good. About 8 more weeks before we can see if your a boy or girl. Well only if you will co-operate and show us :) love you little cashew. We can't wait to meet you :)

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Doc appointment!

OMG! I had my doctors appointment today and we heard the baby's heart beat for the first time! It was amazing! It's crazy to think that the little cashew already has a heart beat that is beating constantly and that we can hear it. Just doesn't seem possible!

I only got about 3-4 hours sleep last night. Then we got up and drove to the doctors. Chris came with me so he could hear it too. The doc appointment was pretty quick. He just went over my blood work and urine sample etc. He said that my thyroid was still high, lower then before but still high. So that could be why I feel so exhausted allll the freaking time. He said we will just have to watch it. Unfortunately the three main signs that it's acting up are the same ones for pregnancy so yeah. I had actually forgot about my thyroid. Here I was thinking that getting old sucks and how am I ever going to have the energy to chase after our kids and how other people my age seem to me more lively then me. But it's probably due to my thyroid. I said that my exhaustion was the same though and he told me to tell him to let him know if it changes. But after I thought about it it really is worse. I mean some days I have to drag myself out of bed and the only reason I do that is because I have to go to work. Being at work sometimes sucks because I just want to let go and collapse on the floor. So now I am kicking myself about that. I have another appointment on sept 24th so I will definately be mentioning it to him them. I thought maybe I was just burning out with work (being on straight afternoons, hardly ever seeing Chris etc) but my thyroid is probably the culprit. I mean my exhaustion is the same now then it was before I was pregnant so yah that is prolly why I said what I did. Only four more weeks to get through then I can talk to him about it more.

But hearing the heart beat was amazing. It was super fast but he said that is normal for babies which are much faster then ours. He said it would be even faster if the baby was awake. So the little bean must have been asleep. Awww! I cannot wait to meet this little person. You hear that baby. I love you tons already :) I really can't wait to find out if it's a girl or a boy. 8 more weeks on that!

Chris said that he was excited to go to the doctors last night and said today that he was really glad to have gone. That's just a big awwww. hehe Daddy loves you too little cashew!

I can definately feel that my stomach is different. It's gotten bigger but it's not just fat I can definately feel something different in there. More then likely it's the placenta. He said I probably won't feel baby movements until 20-30 weeks I guess. I'm only 12 so yeah! I am so excited. Just wish I didn't feel so run down all the time. I want to work out but it's hard to find the energy when I know I will be standing for 8 hours everyday! :(

Sunday, August 22, 2010

11/40 weeks - baby belly!

MY baby belly as of august 22. Starting to show a tiny bit I think? :)

Friday, August 20, 2010

I'm such a procrastinator..

Ugh I need to write in here about my pregnancy more and take more belly pictures. I need to stop procrastinating and write about it. I really want to document this fully as the time goes by. Now I am in week 11, about half way through it. I definately can feel something in my belly. I feel so fat and gross it sucks. I made the mistake of getting on the scale a moment ago and absolutely disgusted with myself, not only because of the number that showed but because I can't stop freaking eating! Mostly Crap to. UGH I need to deal with it now! I need to make a plan and stick to it. Basically eating healthier and working out. I did work out on monday for 25 mins and that was the last time that I did. I don't know what to do. I have start to make a salad with lots of good stuff in it (red onions, peppers, grapes and tomatoe ) so that is a start. Oo that reminds me I need to take my vitamin today. I forgot yesterday. Going to go do that now.

I'm supposed to take it with food but I usually forget and seriously it's like right in front of me as well and I still forget! It's so hard to get down it's so huge. It makes me want to puke! The last few days getting up I have felt really sick that I have to lay back down for a few minutes until I feel good enough to get up. Last night to by the time we went to bed I was feeling sick as well. It helped that chris was rubbing my back, stomach and head though. Last night about an hour before work was done I was feeling really nauseous to. Usually around 10 I start to feel it but sometimes I suck on a candy to take my mind off of it and it usually works. I need to go to SDM and see if they have the jolly rancher candies. They are much better then the ones I currently have.

I need to go bra shopping tommarrow as well. My boobs have been killing me! Some days are worse then others but man! If I don't have a bra on or I just take it off holy CRAP! I usually wear my pink yoga bra around the house and to bed. It's not very supportive though but it's better then nothing. My bras really didn't fit to well to begin with but they are worse now. Last night I had to wear two just to make myself feel secure. Ugh sometimes I hate being a girl. I really hope I don't really weight 176!!!! Geez the other day that I checked first thing in the morning I was only 172! That I can take. God I don't know what the doc is going to say next week! I'm sure they will weight me. Cries! Why couldnt I be one of those people that lose wieght when I am prego in the first trimester! (yes I understand that that really isn't the best thing and no I really don't wish that I just feel like shite about myself at the momement) I probably wouldn't eat so much if I was working days or if I was home though. It's hard to explain but standing at a machine starving really sucks since you can't do anything about it until you are on break. So it's like I eat more so I don't get to that point. No matter what I do though it seems like by midnight I am starving! Blah :(

I really hope I'm not 176. I won't feel better until I weigh myself tommarrow. Also I'm sure I still fit into my jeans so yeah :( you know gaining weight wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to go to work. Hopefully all the weight will just be in my belly.

Thursday, August 19, 2010


My belly I think feels rounder although when I look into the mirror sideways I don't think I am showing at all. What's there is what has always been there, my natural crappy belly. Unless of course I let my gut out but once again that is normal lol. I'm just hoping to not get any stretch marks!

Monday, August 16, 2010


Last friday a fellow co-worker congratulated me on being prego. He said he thought I was even before we told anyone because of my cheeks I guess. They were flusher then normal? lol. He has two kids and he said that he knew both times when his wife was pregnant even before she did. It's funny how some people are more preceptive about things like that :)

Wednesday, August 11, 2010


So today Baby Cashew - mommy puked for the first time. Not fun at all just so you know.

I thought I was going to get away with not being to bad but wow there was no stopping it this time. I feel so gross. I just finished eating to! :( So I don't want to go to work tonight at all because it will be harder to get to the toilet if it happens again and plus now I have nothing in my tummy and I would have to leave for work soon. I would need to eat something and that just isn't happening not after that. grr. I hope Chris gets my email soon and tells them. Guess if I don't hear from him by 2 pm I will call work.

Ugh I hate throwing up!! I don't think I could handle the heat etc tonight. It has just been way to hot at work lately.
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