Thursday, April 22, 2010

Depressed...

I'm just waiting to go to work. I am so tired of afternoons it's not even funny. I am usually always put on the same job which gets old really fast. Not that it's too bad but I have no energy lately (even though that has been true off and on for awhile now, maybe even back before Christmas) so I just don't want to be there. The sucky thing is I just want a few days to do NOTHING and not have to leave the apartment at all for anything. I probably would need an even longer time than a few days but a few days is mostly what I have. I feel like I have been running on empty for a long time.

I really wish that I was on days. It would be so much better for the both of us, especially Chris. I miss seeing him and it's starting to be a really big drag. I really don't see me getting on day shift anytime soon which sucks. Just thinking of working on the opposite shift for x many more months really exhausts me. Plus I get nothing done around the apartment. I wake up too late, but I need that sleep, and then have at the most three hours to do whatever. The last thing I want to do is clean for three hours before work. So yeah.

I am looking forward to the next long weekend. Three day weekend for the win. My birthday is coming up in two weeks also. I have no idea what to do for it. I'm sure we will go for supper and then do nothing. Really what else is there to do. Chris will leave it up to me which yeah like I can think of anything to do. Life sucks.

This whole prego thing sucks ass to. That's another thing how can we start a family when by the time we are both home we are both to tired to try? I am hoping I am now but not knowing is annoying. I won't know until I am late on my period. Then if I do get my period you know how disappointed I will be. It just makes everything seem so impossible. I feel so freaking hopeless it sucks....

3:13 pm

Chris just called and is on his way to get me. I feel so exhausted right now I just want to collapse. I have been trying to not drink caffeine either since I don't think that is a good thing to be consuming a lot of when prego. Not that I know that I am or not. Although I have stopped drinking diet pop which is something I wanted to do for a long while! I basically have stopped eating things with aspartame in them as well - go me. I just wish I had some freaking energy!!!
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