Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Almost time...

So I am started to get serious anxiety about giving birth again. I don't really have a choice seeing as I am due next week but am sooo not ready. I just don't know if I can handle going through the whole not getting any sleep, trying to nurse, not being able to walk around easily the first week and then I have monkey to watch as well. I think mom is planning on helping me at least for a few days so that will be awesome.

I just really want everything to be over with. I hate not knowing when it will start. Today the baby must be right in my pelvis because it has been hurting a lot today (and probably the past few days as well) . My stomach is sooo huge and looks likr a beach ball. I don't remember it looking like that with Monkey. I'm still nervous though! Babies are so much work and I am always tired now and don't get anything done as it is :( GAH! I hope though labour starts during the day and mom can get here to watch Monkey when I need to go to the hospital and that labour starts gradually. UGH when will this be over?

Mom called this morning to give me her cell number and JP's in case she isn't home if I call. She says she looked up when the full moon was and thought she better give me the numbers today since the full moon is tomorrow night. Guess we will see!

I was having a strange dream last night. I don't remember alot but I do remember that I was at the hospital, even though this hospital and town reminded me of no town I have ever seen in my life. Anyways I needed to get to the other part of the hospital that for some reason was not in the same building and I think I was in labour. I have no idea where Chris was and for some reason Tammy's ex (Chris's sister) was going to drive me there but instead he stopped at a grocery store first to get some stuff. He was taking forever that I finally got annoyed and left to find the place myself. It seemed to take forever to find and then get inside. I think I finally did but I felt like I was going around in circles. I don't really remember what happened there but then I was where Chris was and he was mad at me for some reason. I guess because I didn't call him or something even though I had at one point tried my hardest to. He wouldn't talk to me and I was freaking out because I was in labour? Weird dream.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Doc appointment and other rambles..

I had another doctors appointment yesterday (mon) he had my results back from the strep B swab thing I had to do a week before at the last one. It came out neg so that is one less thing to worry about. This appointment went okay. Nothing worrying me and everything seems to be normal. It was a long wait though which sucked. We got there and the whole place was full! So that and monkey not wanting to sit still made it a tad bit stressful for me. I am glad that my weight seems to have stopped rising. It's around 218 I think. Ugh I hate even thinking about that number or looking at it but it is what it is and when this baby is born I can start to lose the weight. (ha it was hard for me to even admit that in my blog!)

I am starting to get more and more anxious since I have no idea what labour coming on naturally feels like. We asked him when is a good time to go to the hospital and he said when contractions get to be about 7 mins apart it is sometimes a good time to go in. The sucky part is that monkey will have to come with us but I think if I start to feel contractions I can call mom and hopefully someone will be able to come up before I have to go to the hospital. For the last few weeks, off and on, I have been having menstrual like cramps. Although it seems like there are more of them this past week and more like braxton hicks contractions. It feels so weird when my stomach gets so hard. I guess I better get as much sleep as I can now because soon I will have none and no time to nap unless Chris is home.

Monkey is as cute as ever. Her sayings now include 'oh no!' 'I see it' (she normally says this and points to the lights), and 'lets go see (grandma, grandpa etc)'. I just love her to death. She is getting so big and she constantly wants me to read to her which is awesome but I have to say I do get tired of reading the same book over and over but I am happy that she takes an interest in reading!

The saturday that just past we took her to the mall to get pictures with Santa! It was his first day being there and that is definitely the time to go since there was hardly a line up. She sat on him without any freak outs although she wouldn't look at the camera to much. But the photo we got of her is cute! We get to get the Christmas photos we had done at Walmart next week sometime.

I think at my next appointment which is next Thurs he is going to check to see if I am dilated at all and he may be doing that sweep thing. Which I am not looking forward to since it was not the funnest the last time. I am so ready to not be pregnant but at the same time I don't want to go through all that again! AHhh at least we have baby names now though. The baby is still so freaking active and today especially. There can't be to much room left in there since it sort of is uncomfortable when the baby stretches or kicks or punches or whatever the baby is doing. I can't wait to find out if it's a boy or girl though!! So exciting.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

anxiety is starting to suck..

I'm starting to get really anxious about labour. It basically could happen anytime. I'm ready to not be pregnant anymore but at the same time I am not ready to have to feed a baby a lot, deal with barely being able to move and deal with monkey all at the same time. The thought just exhausts me. I'm not sure how monkey is going to react to the new baby either. I am confident that nursing might be better this time around since I sort of know what I am doing and I have learned from my many mistakes. I am not looking forward to getting no sleep though. At least this time around right from the start we have the swing. I think that will help a lot. I still don't want to go through labour though lol.

Last night we talked about names again and I think we made good progress. Although spelling is something we have yet to completely decide on since the  names we picked can be spelt various ways. It's nice to have that sort of settled.
 There are still a few random things I need to pack for the hospital that I really should get my butt on that but at least most of it is done. I still need to boil the two small baby bottles as well in case I can't nurse for whatever reason. I just don't know how I am going to be able to spend that amount of time nursing when monkey will want me to pay attention to her or read to her or something. Hopefully the first few days I am home someone else will be with me (like Chris or my mom) so they can keep her occupied while I nurse the baby.

I have been having weird dreams but I can never really remember them lately since they were complicated it seemed. Last night I had one again but this time I knew it had to do with the baby. All I remember is that I was upset that Chris installed the baby seat in the car wrong since it was so easy to move around and it wasn't even hooked into the shell. There was more to it but I forget now. It was one of those back and forth dreams where you never make any progress. It sort of sucked. I was relieved to wake up. The funny thing is I know that that seat in the car doesn't move at all and it's pretty secure so I don't know where that worry came from.

I really hope labour doesn't start out really horrible but gradual. I have no idea what natural labour feels like since I was induced the last time. Oh geez just thinking about that makes me not want to go through it again lol. But in the end it will be worth it since we will have another little one running around  and being all cute.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

back is killing me..

omg I don't know what I did to my back but it is killing me right now! It didn't hurt at the start of the day I don't think but definitely got worse as the day went on. I was soo happy when Chris came home because that meant that I didn't have to pick up monkey anymore. It sucked having to put her in and take her out of her crib when I tried to get her to nap or anytime that I had to change her bum or when I put her in her high chair. I hope it feels better by tomorrow morning or this is going to suck. Ugh this sucks!

Tomorrow is Chris's birthday and I plan on making lasagna for supper. Hopefully I will be able to move :( I have no idea what I am going to do if I cant! ughhh why can't it be the weekend already.

Monkey was so cute today. Around 11 am Max and Ruby was on and Ruby was trying to play twinkle twinkle little star on the piano but her brother kept interrupting her. I wasn't really paying attention to the TV to much but I realized that monkey was singing and it sounded SO MUCH like twinkle twinkle little star. Most of the words were gibberish or at least I couldn't understand them but all the words at the end were almost totally clear! I also love when she plays with her farm set and animals or the sesame street characters with the store front and she is talking like they are talking to each other. It's so cute to watch her. Her voice even goes up and down. I could listen to her do that all day long!

To my relief she also had a poop today. It wasn't that big but it was at least all one lump instead of a bunch of turdlets and it seemed a bit more then yesterday so hopefully we are making some progress. Even though I would say she is still constipated but at least she got some out.

I'm not looking forward to tomorrow though since my back is killing me. The baby is so freaking active today. I can tell there isn't to much room in there since sometimes the movement is really uncomfortable. Soon enough I guess.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Getting Anxious..

So the past few days I have been getting more anxious for the baby. I am not really ready house wise for the baby to come. I also hate that I have no idea when it is going to happen. I am 36 weeks along so basically it can happen anytime! A day last week, near the end I had really bad menstrual like cramps in the afternoon which freaked me out! It happened about three times about 20-30 mins apart. I was like noooo not ready but thankfully they stopped.

Yesterday and today again I have been having random menstrual cramps. I think its probably my body getting ready to have the baby. The baby has been moving a lot though so that is good. I never have had to do the whole drink a glass of water and lay quiet and count the movements because the baby has been moving so much. There can't be to much room left in there!

Wow yesterday morning was horrible though. I got monkey up as usual, got her dressed and then put her in the highchair and gave her her breakfast banana flavoured cookie while I got her milk. She drank that and I sat down at the computer beside her to eat my breakfast while she was eating. Then all of a sudden she started crying really hard. She was like shaking at one point which freaked me out. She still had the cookie shoved into her mouth. She did this a bit a week or so ago and I think later Chris said she did the same thing on the weekend. We are pretty sure she must be cutting teeth again since she is constantly chewing on her fingers and sometimes her wooden blocks. So I figured even though the cookie melts in your mouth it's still pretty hard when you bite into it. I figure she hurt her teeth while trying to bit into it. I did try breaking it into smaller pieces and fed her one that she ate but the second one she wouldn't even try to chew it but started crying hysterically again. It eventually melted in her mouth.

I decided at that time to ditch the cookie and bring her to the front room where I had a little bunch of cheerios with her water for her to eat. This is normally what I do, eat the cookie with milk and have a bit of cheerios while watching treehouse in the morning. I put her down by the coffee table and she just kept crying. I tried holding her and rubbing her head to sooth her but nothing was working. I have to admit I was trying really hard to hold my temper. I was getting so angry and it wasn't because she was crying it was out of frustration that I didn't know exactly what was wrong even though I had a good idea, nor could she tell me what was wrong. I felt like such a horrible person, one because I was failing at consoling her and also because I was losing my temper. I was tired as well having not slept very well.

I put treehouse on and had to go call Chris at work since I was so frustrated. She calmed down though and started eating her cheerios and was better. She did give me a dirty look shortly after when I asked her a question though. She furrowed her brown and glared at me! lol. She never did that before. Thankfully though she was back to normal for most of the day. She did start to get cranky like that later on but it was short lived.

So today I decided to fed her oatmeal instead of her cookie and there was no pain or meltdown today. I was defiantly relieved. Except another concern for me is that she is getting constipated even worse then she has been. I am getting frustrated at what to do! I watched her today at around 4:30 strain really hard to push them out! I thought she must have had a big one since she pushed so hard and it was smelly. Chris got home at around the same time so I made him change it (lol ) but there was hardly any in there! I hope tomorrow is better. I think we have come up with a plan to improve her diet since she must not be getting enough fiber. If that doesn't work we will have to take her back to the doctor for advice. Oatmeal in the morning with milk, less then I normally give her of cheerios between breakfast and dinner with water. Lunch will have veggies (peas and corn etc) and avoid processed package foods as much as possible. Supper will be more veggies with prunes and other items but without milk. Maybe she is getting too much milk and dairy. We are going to avoid any other form of dairy for now just to see if it helps. I am really worried that she is going to get to the point where she tries to stop the poop because it is so hard to pass now and make it worse. We probably will give her some prunes probably with both lunch and dinner. It helped before. She is pretty happy otherwise.

Her words and phrases are 'uh oh' 'oh nooo' and yeeehaw.. So freaking cute!
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...