Tuesday, December 4, 2012

the hospital stay and finally going home with our new little bean!

(writing this next part in march 21st so I forget a lot now)

I really wish that I would have wrote this down sooner then now but better late then never.
It was awesome that Chris was with me but he probably didn't get a lot of sleep. But neither did I so we were even. The baby kept us up that's for sure. I was nursing but I was feeling like it was going all wrong again and it was starting to hurt a lot. The night nurse said that she would put me on the list for the lactation consultant to come see me and it would probably be in the morning. The day nurse that came in checked my latch and said that it was fine but I looked down and didn't see how she thought that. It turns out because she thought it was good she told the lactation consultant not to bother coming to see me! I mean when I heard that I was a little mad! I guess I can understand that she was already booked solid but still!! Please don't make that judgement for me especially when I was having nipple pain and had so much trouble the first time around AND I was not confident at all.

It was hard to get in and out of bed and go to the washroom which is to be expected and it really sucks! I hate this part. I probably would have had an easier time nursingif I could sit up properly and not have my back like totally killing me and not being able to shift to much. I had my nursing pillow this time as well and lots of pillows around me.Another good thing about having a private room (and ours was at the end of the hallway which was even better) was that I felt comfortable with taking a shower and not worrying that someone else needed to use the bathroom! It was SOOO nice!

We didn't bring that much stuff with us like the last time and we still didn't really use to much. We didn't bother even to get phone in my room or TV. Although honestly this time around maybe the TV would have made time go by a bit faster. It really wasn't fun sitting staring at the wall all day long.

The next day (monday), Chris went home to get mom and monkey. We wanted monkey to meet her little sister before we brought her home. On the way back Chris stopped at little Caesars and bought a few pizza's. They were way better then the hospital food! I did try to eat my meals that they gave me as much as possible since I hate wasting food but they were pretty gross and very bland. It was a good visit and I was so happy to see monkey. I missed her terribly and I don't know if it was partly after birth hormones or post partum depression but the night before I was extremely sad and depressed since I knew that our relationship would change. I wouldn't have all the time in the world to focus just on her, and I missed that she used to bring me books to read during the day and want to sit on me when I read them. I missed her cute little face soo much. So I was so happy to see her when Chris brought her in with mom. I was still pretty sad watching her play in the room though. I was afraid that she was going to feel abandoned once we were all home considering all the time I would need to focus on the baby. We also weren't really sure how she was going to react to the baby because we didn't think she understood at all that we were having another baby. She just sort of looked at her and really wasn't to sure about her at all. Then she just ignored her lol.
This day was long and I knew that the night was going to be long as well. I was relieved when they finally took my IV out so I could move around easier! Not that I did much of that but still. Chris took mom and monkey home and then came back. We tried to get as much sleep as possible but it wasn't that easy to do so. The next morning (the 4th) is when I found out the day nurse had told the lactation consultant not to bother coming to my room, but she did see if she had time available for me the next day (wed). Luckily there was.

The baby passed all her testing and the milking of the foot for blood wasn't as bad as it was with monkey for which I was thankful. I was still having trouble with nursing and getting really frustrated. The baby was starting to fall asleep and stop nursing just like monkey did. There was no way I was going to be able to spend that much time with the baby as I did with Monkey. The day nurse was amazing though and I really wish I remembered her name.
They had a girl there that was learning taking my blood pressure etc and she went and got the nurse when I asked if she was coming around sometime because I was having troubles. She was so amazing. She saw what I meant when I said she was falling asleep almost immediately and went and got some sugar water or something and showed us that when she stopped nursing to drop a drop in the corner of her mouth and she would start again. It worked so well I was so relieved!! She said that we could also use some sterilized water as well when we got home. She spent a lot of time with me before we were released. I told her about the troubles with nursing monkey and how stressful it was. She told me that often times people are to hard on themselves and give up because they feel like the baby is getting nothing when in fact it is because they were so stressed to begin with. Stress effects your milk supply. She was like I am going to make a suggestion and it's only a suggestion and I always make sure I say this now because she said she got in trouble once for saying it. But she said I could always nurse the baby then give her an oz of formula or expressed breast milk (if possible) a few times a day so that you know that she is getting something. Just until my milk comes in or even for a few days after that. I was like holy crap why didn't I think of that? I mean I would have literally went home and suffered through it the way I did with monkey and get so stressed out about it that my milk supply probably would suffer again. We talked about other things but she made me feel so hopeful that I could actually do this. She was like you know what before you leave and since I know how the baby has been nursing I would feel more comfortable if before you go that you feed her a bit of formula. She was like it is just a suggestion but said  it would make her feel better and probably me as well. I was like you know what yes lets do that. I was told that the baby was a bit jaundice around this time to and that was another reason why I was OK with feeding her a bit of formula to help flush it out of her system. I was told that she was a bit jaundice offhand and not like just so you know she is a bit I mean seriously!!! I wouldn't have known that she was you know!? I don't even want to think about what would have happened if she wasn't getting enough fluids or whatever, and got worse and I didn't notice or something!! 

Chris fed her a bit from the bottle the nurse gave us. I cant remember how much maybe 10-15mls? But I felt honestly felt SO much better. It felt like forever before we actually left the hospital and this time at the desk we asked about a wheel chair. They seem to not have very many there for some reason? I mean do they actually think that people can make it all the way down to the pick up area after giving birth?? I did make it the last time but I almost passed out in the process and it's hard to walk really slowly because you feel so stupid! The walk is pretty far as well. The helpful nurse found one and wheeled me down while Chris carried the baby. I then waited inside while he went with the baby to get the car. Even that much tired me out! But I was SO happy to be home and able to sleep in my own bed.


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