Monday, May 2, 2011

8:23 am

Stupid power was off again this morning when we woke up. Chris called around 8 am to say that he tried calling the outage line and it was busy so he looked online at the newspaper website and it said that power was down through out the city (well certain parts) from about 5:30 in the morning and they expect it to be back on by 8:30.

It just came on about 10 mins ago! Woot! Soooo much better being able to watch tv or go online. Haha even though I probably will just read for a bit! lol. Oh well I am glad it's back on mostly for the heat since it's sort of cold in here and I worry that monkey will be too cold. She is snuggled in a few blankets in her swing sleeping peacefully at the moment :) She was really fussy this morning at her feeding at 7am. She might have had only two let downs and then was being all pulling away and punching me etc. So I just put her back in her cradle. We got up a few mins after that though anyways and she seemed content so I guess she got enough? Baby is so confusing! I wish I knew how much she got from each let down geeez. I guess if she was hungry still she would let me know! and now she is asleep!?

Her poop also this morning looked almost the yellow brown colour again and I don't think is smelled as nasty so that is a plus. I really can't stomach that smell. Although it was hard to tell since we didn't have any power so it could have just been the darkness making it look not so green. Regardless it will be nice to know why there is mucas in her stool when we go ask the doctor. I really don't want to have to leave the house but at the same time it might be nice to get out of the house. I need to plan a library trip sometime this week. Especially considering I am almost done the last book that is out currently of Sookie Stackhouse series. So many books I want to read and not enough time to read them!


I am so glad that we have a doctors appointment today. I fed her or tried to feed her at 7 am today and she didn't eat the greatest. I think maybe a let down on each side then she was just not having any of it so I gave up. I got up for the day and brought her out to her playpen while I brought everything else we need for the day out. She was wide awake and happy while Chris was eating his breakfast and talking to her. So I was like hmm must have gotten enough then since she is not cranky? Since it was cold out and we had no power I put her had on swaddled her in a blanket put her in her swing and put another one on top of her. Her little hands were cold so I didn't want her to be cold. Three hours passed and she started to semi wake up and so I changed her bum which had a little pee in it and then tried to feed her. Well she was having none of it. She didn't have a good latch no matter how many times I tried and she would do her usually and wiggle her head till she is completely right on the nipple. Such a bad habit! Then she just wouldn't have a good suction at all, it's really weak. She might have had at least a let down on each side but most often then not she would take a few swallows then stop eating! So frustrating! I kept putting her back and forth between the sides. A few times she got into the pulling her head away and wacking me with her arms. Then she would fall asleep. I gave up after an hour but she once again didn't seem like she was hungry! Yet when I went to feed her the next time, I noticed my breasts were starting to get engorged so umm yeah! That was a warning bell to me and made me worry a lot again. Seriously I don't get it. I did a few things then sat in the rocker and tried again and it was mostly more of the same. The last time we were with Heidi she asked me if I had noticed her suction getting stronger, because I guess it's supposed as well as her getting more efficient with getting the milk out. So what the hell, she has gone in the complete opposite directon. I seriously don't see why I am continuing this. Bottle feeding seems so much easier. But now even that makes me weary since twice in the past few days the power has been out. How can I feed her formula if I can't prepare it because we have no electricity!! Like I said I might have given up before now but because of the benefits to baby and all the crap we spent on breastfeeding things I don't want to switch over! I'm totally being stubborn and I don't want to give up but maybe I just can't do it? I can't take the freaking stress anymore :( I guess I will see what the doctor says today about this and her poop problem. I'm sure he will probably tell me to go to a lactationist though. I don't know if I should see if Heidi has a spot open this wed right now or after the doc appointment. I can't even really talk to Chris about it until he come to get me. I don't really want to call him and talk to him since he probably will be leaving soon anyways. UGH!!

8:40 pm

So the doctors appointment went alright. He was not concerned about the green mucus poop at all. He said that it could be a few different things and he said it all depends on how fast it goes through her system. So that is good. It could be an infection, or just one of those things. Since there isn't any other symptoms he basically said it was nothing to worry about. She seems fine otherwise. The poop today doesn't seem as bad as it had been so that is semi good. Still realllly gross to change her though. Especially when it's all over her and not just on the diaper! ewww.

She was weighed before we actually saw the doctor and she was bang on 11lbs! The little monkey! I seriously don't see how she continues to gain so much weight considering all the troubles I have with feeding her :( But I guess I am doing something right if she keeps going up. The last few feeds have been better. She actually was eating so that is an improvement. Although she has eaten every hour for at least 30mins each time. I don't know if this is her growth spurt or not. As long as it doesn't happen when I want to go to bed I don't care! The last feeding she did really good and actually went on both sides getting a few let downs on each side. She actually didn't fall dead asleep after being on one side for 10ish mins like the two times previously either. I'm relieved that she did better the last few times though. I still really hate this breastfeeding crap though. Right now she is in her swing sleeping which is way better then her crying.


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