Monday, May 16, 2011


Last night monkey was almost laughing out loud. It was the cutest thing ever. We both cannot wait until she does. I had just finished feeding her and I was talking to her and she was all smiles for the longest time. She started cooing a bit. Chris could hear her all the way from the computer. He said she was doing the same thing earlier when he had her on the play mat on the ground. So close to giggling and laughing.

I had stopped taking fenugreek on Friday night to see if I could slowly stop taking the herbs instead of just stopping both suddenly. But yesterday her feedings started going to crap again so the herbs must be making a difference. It was so stressful she was frantic to get milk but either wasn't getting it fast enough or wasn't getting enough. I started taking them at once again. I can't deal with that whole situation again. Thankfully they aren't that much money. I only have enough for today and part of tomorrow so I need to go down and get some more. She had a better time eating in the wee hours of the morning and this morning so far. So that is a HUGE relief.

Yesterday I had decided to switch to bottle feeding, or hopefully be able to do some supplementing but still breast feed some of the time. It definitely is something we need to talk to with the doctor at least and possibly Heidi as well. Today I'm not so sure anymore. I hate this going back and forth. I feel so guilty wanting to quit and then I feel like I went through all that trouble to stop just before she is three months? I guess though it's not all for nothing as she did get breast milk for two months.

My only concern about switching over and being totally bottle fed is what would I do if the power is off all day long again. Although I like Chris's idea that we could have a case or a few cans or whatever amount of premixed ready to go formula in case that happens again. I don't know. It all depends on what we can do and what the doctor says. I have no idea how to bottle feed. How often does she get one? How much? How do we know when to increase to an extra ounce? What are her diapers like? Ugh so many questions.

Although at least mom and Tam and everyone would be able to answer those questions since they all bottle fed. I still don't know what to do. I don't think I will know until I know more and just up and decide one day that I can't continue.

okay monkey is getting cranky. gotta go see why :)


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